Parent lures a child away to kidnap them and keep them away from the other parent.

Parental Kidnapping: What it is and How to Prevent it

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Nothing makes rough family life more harrowing than being haunted by the idea of parental kidnapping. Parental kidnapping happens every day, and it tears families apart.

However, there are many precautions you can take to prevent spousal kidnapping. These precautions are simple and easy to follow.

Even if your child is abducted by your spouse, you can make sure they come back to you as quickly as possible.

You also need to know what constitutes parental kidnapping, so that you don’t take any rash or unnecessary actions. So read this guide thoroughly so you can be as informed as possible on spousal kidnapping.

What is Parental Kidnapping? 

The exact kidnapping definition varies from state to state. However, it is generally agreed upon that child kidnapping is the taking or hiding of a child by a parent in violation of the other parent’s rights.

What this means in practice is that if there is a legal custody agreement between people about visitation rights, taking custody of the child outside of the agreed timeframe would be parental child abduction.

So if two parents divorce, they might agree that one has custody rights during the week, and the other has visitation rights on weekends.

If the parent with weekend visitation rights picks the child up from school on a Tuesday and keeps them at their house for the night, that parent could be charged with child abduction.

Another example would be a parent with weekend visitation rights refusing to return the child to the parent with weekday custody.

If they were to keep the child past the weekend and took that child across state lines, this would be an example of interstate child abduction.

How Can I tell if My Spouse Will Kidnap My Children?  

There are several ways to tell if your spouse is planning on abducting your child, or if they’re likely to kidnap your child.

Some warning sins are:

  • Taking your child to unknown places without your consent or knowledge in the past.
  • Behave abusively towards your child.
  • History of threatening to kidnap your child before.
  • The parent has no job, family, or friends in the state.
  • Recently quit their job and have been gathering your child’s records.
  • Married for citizenship status, and your marriage has gone sour and any of the previous conditions apply.

If you suspect your souse is likely to kidnap your child, inform your lawyer and any family members.

What Can I Do if My Child is Kidnapped? 

Unfortunately, if your child is going to be kidnapped, they will most likely be kidnapped by a family member.

In the event that you become aware that your child has been kidnapped by your spouse, here are some tips on what you can do.

Contact your spouse.

People are only human, and sometimes they may forget what day it was. Make absolutely sure that your spouse has kidnapped your child with malicious intent. Also, remember that most children who are kidnapped do come home.

Contact your spouse’s family.

If something has happened to your spouse, like a car accident or fire, their family members will be the first to know.

Contact the authorities.

If your child hasn’t been brought back to you when you have custody, the police will investigate.

If you do this, be aware that your child may not ever see that parent again, as they will lose custody, and will not be able to provide for your child.

How Can I Prevent My Spouse from Kidnapping My Child? 

While you can’t control what your spouse does, you can deter them from parental child abduction with some precautions.

The first thing you want to do is to make sure you have updated photos of your child. A picture of them in the last six months should be enough to help people find them.

Make sure you have updated copies of your spouse’s passport, social security number, and the make and model of their car. If you can get their driver’s license number, and their bank account numbers, that would also go a long way.

Make sure you have all of their phone numbers and a current picture.

Also, have the contact information to one of their friends, co-workers, or business associates, as those persons might know about any places they like to frequent, or any preferred hotels or airlines.

They may also know where they were seen last.

Remember to get your child’s fingerprints on record so they can be traced if they’re taken by your spouse.

This makes it much easier to track them down in the event that they run away with your children without telling you where they went.

All of this may seem excessive or intrusive to your former partner, and they may ask the same information of you. If this is the case, it may come to pass that neither of you feels comfortable giving this information up.

In this case, you should consider giving this information to a neutral third party, preferably to your respective lawyers, or anyone else who could be trusted with your sensitive information.

Are There Exceptions To Child Kidnapping Laws? 

If the other parent has reason to believe you have been abusive to your child, they can take them to a court and file for emergency custody.

The other parent may be granted emergency custody if they believe you have been abusing your child, neglecting them, or putting them in life-threatening situations.

If they claim this, it is on them to prove their allegations. They are also going to have to take action as soon as they’re aware of any abuse on your part.

You Can Make Sure Your Kids Are Safe

Your top priority is making sure your children are safe, even from a parent that would hurt them.

If you suspect that your child may be in danger of parental kidnapping, it’s in your best interest to do everything you can to protect them.

This is especially true if there isn’t a current custody agreement between you and your child’s other parent.

Getting a good lawyer is instrumental in expediting any custody agreements. If you don’t have a lawyer or would like to bolster your legal counsel, you can search for one here.

Making sure there are clear legal boundaries that define when your child is allowed to leave your care is paramount to their safety and your peace of mind.

Sources

[1] Kidnapping Statistics. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.creditdonkey.com/kidnapping-statistics.html

[2] National Child Kidnapping Facts. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.pollyklaas.org/about/national-child-kidnapping.html

divorce ligation vs divorce mediation in family law

Divorce Litigation vs Divorce Mediation: Which is Right for You?

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40% to 50% of first marriages will end up in divorce. The figures are higher for subsequent marriages.

Irrespective of how you arrived at the decision to get divorced, this is a tumultuous time for most couples. It is even worse if children are involved.

Still, going through the divorce process is the only way to sever that relationship and get clarity on matters like the kid’s custody and asset division.

Divorce litigation and divorce mediation are the two ways that can get you there. However, which option is best for your situation?

Let’s look at what each entails and which one is best for you.

What Is Divorce Litigation?

A divorce goes through many steps and processes, with the steps varying from state to state and couple to couple.

Usually, each party hires its own lawyer to identify and negotiate issues about their divorce on their behalf.

These two lawyers become central to the divorce and enter negotiations regarding their client issues.

If the two cannot agree on one or two issues, the divorce is moved to a family court. Here, a court date is set, and each attorney will prepare their case alongside their client.

All documents regarding the case are presented, and the lawyers make their arguments in front of a judge. Witnesses and other external experts might be called to testify as well.

At times, the couple’s children take the stand too.
Ultimately, the sitting judge will make a judgment regarding child custody, time-sharing, alimony, child support and division of assets.

What Is Divorce Mediation?

A mediator is an independent, objective person who helps people resolve conflict amicably.

For people trying to end their marriage, the divorce itself is the conflict. Issues like kids, custody, and asset division are among the things they have to resolve.
A successful mediation helps them settle these issues out of court.

While a good mediator is an active participant in mediation talks, the spouses have a say in the decision making. It is important to note that mediators are not necessarily lawyers.

Mediator vs. Lawyer

This choice is dependent on the individual circumstances of your divorce case. Some will favor mediation, while others require divorce lawyers. Keep reading to find out which you should go for.

When to Use Mediation

This is a less confrontational approach to divorce and is best if you want to settle things quietly. Go for it in the following circumstances.

1. You Want to Protect Your Kids

Your kids stand over and above all the other circumstances surrounding the divorce. While divorce is tough on parents, it’s tougher on kids.

Any steps you take to protect your kids and maintain a semblance of united family unit-despite the divorce-are worth looking into.

Mediation allows you to negotiate as parents other than opposing teams. This is favorable for custody, co-parenting and timesharing.

When handled properly and level-headedly, a mediation ensures that the kids come first and that parents do not end up pitting the kids against each other.

2. You Want to Save Money

Litigation fees are higher that mediation fees. If the divorce drags out or has some complicated aspects to it, divorce attorney’s fees might go through the roof.

By opting for mediation, you can save a pretty penny on your divorce.

3. You Want a Peaceful Process

Divorces can get ugly. Custody and asset sharing are both emotive topics that can muddle the process even farther.

When parties engage in accusations and counter-accusations to get an edge over their partner, the process gets acrimonious pretty quickly.

By opting to have your divorce mediated, both parties agree to focus on the issues as opposed to mudslinging and getting an edge over each other.

It’s on this premise that divorce mediation is peacefully carried out.

4. You Want a Quick Process

Comparatively speaking, mediated divorces take much less time than divorce litigation.

The back and forth between attorneys make a litigated divorce drag out much longer. In mediation, all matters are brought up and are tabled for real-time discussion and resolution.

This settles issues much faster than attorneys going back and forth on each individual matter.

5. You Want Control over the Process

Mediation gives you and your husband full control to customize your agreement to your specific needs.

This control and empowerment yield a fair agreement to both of you. When no one walks away feeling cheated, the process of healing and co-parenting becomes significantly easier.

When is Divorce Litigation the Best Way Forward?

This process involves a judge and might take longer than mediation. Use it in the following circumstances.

1. You Fear For Your Safety

Your safety should be a primary concern. If the relationship is characterized by power imbalances where one party is unable to speak for themselves, then litigation is the only way out.

The same goes for when there is a restraining order in place. Or the marriage being dissolved is highly volatile and abusive.

Currently, 10 million women and men are in physically abusive relationships. In this case, litigation is best.

2. Asset Hiding

Mediation requires transparency and good faith.

If you have evidence that your spouse is hiding debts or assets, then mediation is not a good option. The same is true for when you suspect your spouse’s business dealings are not above board.

In such cases, a divorce lawyer can, through the courts, compel your spouse to make full disclosure and provide documentation to uncover the truth.

3. Your Spouse Is Incapacitated

Mediation provides a space for self-determination, where either party is encouraged to articulate their wishes and interest in the negotiations.

Your spouse might be unable to do this for themselves due to drug addiction or other factors that may lead to a diminished mental state.

In this case, opting for litigation allows a judge to make a determination on your divorce.

 

4. One Party Is Against Mediation

Unlike litigation, mediation is a voluntary process. Both of you must be willing to participate in the process for it to be successful.

If you are for mediation but your spouse is against it, litigation is the second best option.

Which Route Should You Take?

Sometimes a divorce that starts with mediation can end up in divorce litigation and vice versa. Ultimately, it takes two well-meaning parties to have an amicable dissolution of a marriage.

At Family Law Attorneys Near Me, we know that finding a good family lawyer amid your divorce can be yet another stressful task you should not have to deal with.

For this reason, we have listed over 2000+ top attorneys to help you find the best one in your locality. Click this link to get started.

 

Sources

[1] Marriage and Divorce. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/topics/divorce/
[2] Choosing an Effective Mediator. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.americanbar.org/groups/young_lawyers/publications/tyl/topics/litigation/choosing-effective-mediator/

co-parenting tips for seperated or divorced parents

Co-Parenting After Divorce: A Constantly Changing Challenge

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Co-parenting after divorce is never easy. Divorce comes with a lot of heartache for everyone, even when it is the best choice. And the constant back-and-forth of co-parenting can lead to even more stress.

The keys to a good co-parenting agreement are flexibility and understanding, but how flexible? How understanding? Does the agreement need to be revisited periodically?

Actually, yes. A co-parenting agreement isn’t set in stone. Just like the people it affects, it needs to grow and change as life circumstances do.

Let’s look at a few times you should update your co-parenting agreement, and what that looks like for your family.

Co-Parenting Keys to Success

Divorce is hard. And it keeps being hard even after time has passed. Sometimes it can be stunning just how much your feeling toward this person you once loved has changed.

And yet, when there are children involved, the adults involved have to be willing to put the hurt aside in order to create a healthy, nurturing environment, especially when it comes to your co-parenting agreement.

So how can you make sure your co-parenting talks will be healthy and productive? A few ways.

Put the Hurt Aside

Providing there was not an issue of abuse in your marriage, it’s time to put the hurt aside, at least when you are dealing directly with issues around your kids.

You’re going to have to deal with this person for the duration of your kid’s childhoods, and probably longer. So now is the time to compartmentalize and do what you can to set aside the negative feelings.

Keep the Kids Out of It

Kids are not divorce messengers, and while you may still harbor anger toward your Ex, your kids just know that they are their parent, and they love them.

Trying to weaponize kids in order to change your co-parenting agreement isn’t fair or healthy for anyone involved. Changes to your agreement need to be between you and your ex.

Keep Communication Open

As long as there is no domestic abuse or toxicity, make sure you are communicating with your ex constantly. Updates on the kids, decisions that need to be made together, etc. It’s really like still being married, but without the cohabitation.

You need to be willing to listen, and willing to communicate. This is what facilitates an easier process.

SO now let’s dig in. When should you take a look at your co-parenting agreement?

Co-Parenting When One Parent Relocates

If one of you takes a new job or relocates for any reason, it’s time to look at the agreement. After all, if one of you lives in New Hampshire and the other in Arizona, those weekend visits are going to get a little difficult.

Parents sometimes have to move. It’s inevitable. But it’s vital to then take a look at your agreement so you can hash out where the kids are going to be.

It’s likely that a court will rule that the kids not accompany the moving parent (unless they were the custodial parent, to begin with), as staying at their current school and environment is typically best.

But negotiations can help hash out holidays and vacations to ensure ample time is still spent with the relocated parent.

Danger to the Child

If you feel your child is in danger, it is VITAL to go to the courts and request a change to your agreement.

Now, it’s important to understand that a different parenting style does not constitute abuse or danger, and the court will not change your agreement just because one parent allows juice at mealtimes while the other only allows water.

But if you are worried about suspicious bruising or newfound fears in your child, or are otherwise uneasy about their physical safety, you are within your rights to go to the courts, if only to request a temporary change while an investigation is carried out.

Periodic Maintenance

Like any agreement, as your kids grow, taking a look at the agreement is a good idea.

Sitting down and asking “Is this still working? Is this still in the best interests of everyone involved?” ensures that everyone’s needs are still being met and that everyone involved is still be served well by the agreement.

Think of this like a well-child check. It’s possible that nothing needs to change, that the agreement is still working and that everyone is fine with it. But this periodic check-in keeps communication lines open and everyone on the same page. It also helps to avoid pent-up frustration and resentment if one party is feeling slighted or annoyed.

Like with any part of your life, you want to check in occasionally to make sure everything is still healthy.

Negative Situations

Sometimes, your ex does not act in good faith and may refuse to honor your agreed upon schedule. If this happens, and you’ve attempted to resolve the issue yourself, it may be time to get the court involved.

The court can help you not only enforce your current agreement but change it to ensure that the non-custodial parent (or custodial parent) is not abusing their end of the agreement.

Co-Parenting After Divorce: A Constantly Changing Challenge

Whether you are an old hand at co-parenting after divorce or new to the entire process, you need someone to help you through. A family attorney can ensure that you are treated fairly during proceedings, and can help you navigate the complexities of family law.

If you need to create or revisit a co-parenting plan and don’t want to go it on your own, take a look here. You can find a family attorney in your area and get the help you need.

 

Sources

[1] Emotional Stages Of Divorce. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.womansdivorce.com/emotional-stages-of-divorce.html

 [2] Patrick A. Coleman. (2017, September 19). Don’t Tear Down Your Ex in Front of Your Kids. Retrieved from https://www.fatherly.com/parenting/how-to-talk-young-child-about-ex-spouse/

 

do i need a lawyer for a will

Drafting a Will: Things You Should Consider

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Just 1 in 5 millennials have a will.

Even some famous people, like Aretha Franklin, passed away without a will. Your estate may not be worth the $80 million that the Queen of Soul’s was. But that is no excuse, if you own any property or have any money to your name, you can get started drafting a will.

So now that that is settled, you may be asking, do I need a lawyer for a will? Many people will tell you that if don’t have a large or complicated estate then you don’t need a lawyer.

This advice isn’t totally correct, here’s when you need a lawyer to help you write a will.

You Need an Estate Plan

Most people assume you need a will to distribute your assets when you pass away. What you really need is an estate plan. What’s the difference?

An estate plan is an entire set of legal documents that take care of everything in preparation for your death or disability. A will is just one of these documents in the plan.

Without an attorney, you’ll miss other important documents that will make your loved one’s lives easier. This could include items like a healthcare power of attorney, or financial power of attorney, or disposition of final remains.

You Don’t Know What You Don’t Know

To build on our last point, you don’t know what you are missing when you don’t know your options. This is bigger than creating an estate plan.

For example, each state creates their own laws for inheritance and probate. First, you’ll need to make sure that you follow all of the laws for your state. Then you need to look into the laws of all states where you have assets.

If you don’t follow the law to the letter, your will could end up unenforceable. If this happens your estate will follow intestacy laws, which may or may not align with your wishes.

There Are Unknown Complicating Factors

There are certain circumstances in life that will complicate things. The more complicated your life, the more complicated your estate plan, the more you need a lawyer to guide you.

Multiple Marriages

Have you married multiple times? If so, you’ll need to address this and if there are any previous agreements with your ex-spouses.

Own a Business

If you own a business then you need to discuss with a lawyer what happens to that. You need to create a plan for what happens and address any possible claims your family could have on the business.

Caring for Family

If you currently care for an incapacitated or disabled family member, then creating a will may not be enough. You’ll want to ensure their care continues beyond your passing. A lawyer can advise you on a better way to do this such as a trust.

Minor Children

If you have minor children, you’ll need to create a section of the will that outlines their care. We know this is a tough thing to think about, but if something happens, who will care for your children?

How will you ensure the money you leave for them will go towards their care?

Save Money

So you’re tempted to do a will yourself because you think hiring a lawyer is too expensive? But this is only looking at the short term.

What a lawyer can tell you is how your decisions now will cost you in the future. If you don’t prepare your will correctly, you could end up costing your heirs expensive fees in estate taxes.

Federal Estate Tax

The federal estate tax seems like a high threshold at $5.49 million. But 2 in every 1,000 have to face paying it. It ends up being about 1/6th of their total estate.

The good news is that there are loopholes to avoid this tax. An attorney can help you navigate these loopholes.

State Estate and Inheritance Taxes

You will need to talk with a lawyer if your state has an estate or inheritance tax. Did you know there is a difference between these two types of taxes?

Six states impose an inheritance tax. This is a tax imposed on the person inheriting.

While fifteen states impose an estate tax. This is a tax imposed on the estate no matter who the intended heir is.

Ongoing Support

The law is a changing and evolving thing. So if you prepare your will in accordance with the law today, it may not comply with the law in effect when you pass away.

Changing Laws

When you work with a skilled and knowledgeable firm they can give you ongoing support. They can also check your documents for any errors that might render your will invalid.

Changing Life Circumstances

You can also reach out and consult with them as your life changes. Let’s say you get married, or have children, or buy a home. These are all life events that will be a trigger to update your will.

Do I Need a Lawyer for a Will? The Answer Is Yes.

Hopefully, you should no longer be asking, “do I need a lawyer for a will?” The answer is yes, you do. Sure, you can try to use those online premade forms and templates.

But then you run the risk of not having your estate distributed the way you intend and wish. You risk having your will deemed invalid.

You risk your heirs paying heavy estate taxes. You risk missing out on completing important documents.

So let’s help you prepare your will by taking the first step, finding a knowledgeable and skilled estate attorney. Look for a lawyer to help you write your will today.

domestic violence and divorce

What You Need to Know About How Domestic Violence Could Influence Your Divorce Case

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Did you know that more than 10 million women and men are physically abused by an intimate partner annually? Divorces with domestic violence more common than you think.

It’s no wonder so many people eventually have to find a lawyer to help them in their situation.

Divorces are one of those things that can often turn very messy.

Keep reading to learn what you need to know about domestic violence and divorce.

What to Know About Domestic Violence and Divorce

Going through a divorce is a stressful and complicated process. When you add domestic violence and divorce to the mix it gets even more complicated. If you are a victim of domestic violence you should immediately find an experienced top family lawyer to determine the best legal actions to protect you and your family.

Federal and state statutes have been put in place to discourage and punish acts of domestic violence. In 1994 Congress passed the Violence Against Women Act. States have put in place Uniform Interstate Enforcement of Domestic Violence Protection Orders Act.

Get Help

Domestic violence is a situation that can happen to anyone. First, protect yourself to be safe from further harm. If you’re under domestic violence threat call the police or get out of the house.

At this point don’t worry about how this will impact your divorce get yourself in a safe environment. Once you are in a place where you don’t feel threatened consult with a divorce attorney about the legal consequences of moving out, separation, and getting protective restraining orders.

Restraining Orders

Every state has its own legal rights and options to protect themselves against their abuser. A knowledgable attorney will help the abused victim get a restraining or protective order to provide them with legal protection. Depending on the state a restraining order can force the court to order the abuser to vacate the home and stay somewhere else.

If the abuser were to violate this court order they will have serious consequences. This can include arrest and trouble un future child custody hearings.

Alimony and Domestic Violence

Depending on the state domestic violence can be a factor the court considers when determining alimony payments. Some states consider violence as instances of marital misconduct. This might cause the court to adjust an alimony award during a divorce.

Child Custody Rights and Domestic Violence

The first step before finalizing a divorce or even starting a divorce process seek an emergency protective domestic violence restraining order. Then ask the judge for temporary custody and only supervised visitation rights. You want to keep your child or children safe.

Once the child custody cased is opened the judge will review the case and make a decision. Some states will not grant sole or shared child custody to a parent that is found guilty of domestic violence.

In some states, the courts can consider abuse against any of the following related to the other parent not just abuse against the other parent:

  • Child’s grandparent
  • Roommate

Splitting up Assets During a Divorce with Domestic Violence

When it comes to divorce and splitting up assets domestic violence plays a major role. The following covers different ways that domestic violence affects assets.

Domestic Violence as Economic Misconduct

Some states don’t allow the courts to consider marital fault when it comes to domestic violence. Instead, they permit the consideration of economic fault. For domestic violence to be considered in the splitting of assets the court has to find evidence of the economic impact the abuse caused.

Evidence that is allowed to be presented in court to prove economic misconduct includes:

  • Loss of a job because of calling out due to injury
  • An illness that resulted from domestic violence
  • Victim having to move to avoid violence
  • Higher health care costs

Domestic Violence as a Casual Factor

In some states, domestic violence has an impact on splitting up assets. If the state considers fault to domestic violence to be a factor in divorce proceedings then it will have a significant impact on the outcome.

In some jurisdictions, domestic violence is specifically addressed and weighed in the process of property division and assets division. Some courts will assume the abuse was the causal factor in the divorce and marital breakdown.

Domestic Violence Limited to Egregious

Some states only view domestic violence as being relevant when splitting assets if the abuse was egregious. This means the abused will have to establish that the abuse was in fact egregious. It can have different connotations depending on the courts perspective this can vary.

Splitting assets during the divorce with domestic violence in a state that needs to see the abusive situation as extreme and shocking will need extra work on the abused side. This is why an experienced lawyer is always recommended.

Domestic Violence in the Exclusion of All Fault

This is when fault isn’t considered under any circumstance in the division of assets. This completely excludes domestic violence as a factor from the divorce.

These states adhere to the Uniform Marriage and Divorce Act. This act requires the division of assets without regard to marital misconduct.

Call an Experienced Attorney

As the information above reinforced contact a knowledgeable attorney to make sure you’re going in the right direction. As mentioned earlier divorce isn’t an easy situation and if you are adding domestic violence to it there’s more emotional baggage and legal situations to deal with.

Please keep in mind if you have children and are going through a divorce and dealing with domestic violence make sure your children are out of harm’s way.

Looking for a lawyer to handle your domestic violence and divorce case? Find the perfect lawyer for you in our 6,000 plus listings.

 

Sources

[1] NCADV | National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://ncadv.org/statistics

[2] A Guide to the Uniform Interstate Enforcement of Domestic Violence Protection Orders Act, 1998-2008. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.lib.utexas.edu/taro/utlaw/00040/law-00040p119.html

do i need a lawyer for a will

Preparing Your Will: 8 Important Checklist Items to Consider

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Sixty percent of Americans admit to not having a will prepared. 

Preparing a will is a task many people will put off because they believe they still have many years to live. But unless you can predict the future, you should prepare a will now just in case. 

There are many important reasons for having a will. Having a will can prevent family disputes, provide for your loved ones, plan for your funeral arrangements. 

By now you probably understand the importance of drawing up a will, but what should you actually include in it? Here are eight checklist items to include in your will.

1. Assets

When wondering what to put in a will, assets are probably the first things that come to mind. 

Here are a few assets to consider when writing out your will:

  • Bank accounts
  • Investments
  • Retirement funds
  • Cars, boats, or real property
  • Royalties or copyrights

This is not an all-inclusive list. There are many other things you can consider as an asset, ranging from frozen embryos to social media accounts that generate income. 

2. Guardianship

Guardianship is one of the most important aspects of a will. 

If you have children, choosing a person to take guardianship of them if you die is no easy task. The most obvious option is the child’s other parent, but in the event that both of you pass,  there should be an alternative guardian declared. 

Consider close family members and friends. Choose someone you think would be responsible and love your child as their own.

The most important thing to do is to ask their permission first and see how they feel about the idea. If they do not wish to take on guardianship, don’t include them in your will anyway. This isn’t fair to them or your child. 

While not as common, many people choose to also include guardianship of pets in their will. 

3. Real Property

While some may include this with their assets, real property is another one of the big things to include in a will.

this includes your primary residence, any vacation or rental homes, and any other owned properties. You can assign that a specific real property is left to certain beneficiaries.

You can also decide that all your real property is to be sold and the profits divided up among your beneficiaries. This can make things more equal if you have multiple beneficiaries. 

4. Specific and Residuary Bequests 

When putting together a will, you shouldn’t forget about any specific bequests. 

Do you have a family heirloom that you’ve promised to a specific family member? What about gifting each of your grandchildren a specific amount of cash for their college fund? These are considered specific bequests. 

Once all specific bequests and real property is taken care of, you can then choose residuary bequests. This involves any remaining assets being divided among beneficiaries. So after your specific requests, you can choose to have all your assets divided equally among all your children. 

5. Alternate Beneficiaries

It’s always a good idea to name alternate beneficiaries in your will. 

While you may want a specific family member or spouse to be your beneficiary, there is a possibility that they won’t be alive when you die. In this case, you should name alternate beneficiaries. 

You can name one or multiple people as an alternate beneficiary. You can also choose to make a specific charity an alternate beneficiary. 

6. Business Assets

Don’t forget about any business assets when putting together your will. 

If you own a business, you want to make sure it is taken care of in the event of your death. You don’t want your employees showing up to work one day unsure of what to do with the company. Instead, include your business assets in your will. 

You can choose to name a business beneficiary to take over the business, be it a family member or an employee. You could also choose to have the business sold off and the profits given to your employees or family members. 

Either way, be specific about all of your business assets. 

7. Debts and Taxes

To minimize work later on for your loved ones, also consider any debts or taxes you may owe. 

Plan out how any debts you owe are to be handled. Don’t forget about probate costs, real estate tax, and inheritance tax. 

You can also include funeral expenses and specific funeral plans in this section of your will. It’s best to have these things planned and handled ahead of time.  

The easiest way to take care of this is to mark a specific bank account or amount of cash be left to handle these expenses. 

8. An Executor

The final, but extremely important thing you should include in your will is an executor. 

An executor is a person who is in charge of making sure your will is carried out according to your specific wishes. They handle dividing up all your assets and any other aspect of your will. 

The executor can also be in charge of your end-of-life decisions, including do-not-resuscitate orders. 

Just like with your beneficiaries, it’s advised that you also name an alternate executor. Your first choice for executor may be deceased or choose to decline the responsibility. 

Need Help Preparing Your Will?

Now that you know the eight main things to include in your will, it’s time to prepare yours. 

It’s important to seek legal help when preparing a will. There are plenty of free resources online that claim they make will preparation easy. But the truth is, these documents aren’t state specific and don’t account for everything. 

To avoid mistakes and hassle down the line for your loved ones, seek professional legal help when preparing your will. A professional is able to answer all your last will and testament questions. 

Not sure where to go for professional legal help? Visit our online database to find the best family attornies in your location. 

child custody case

7 Common Mistakes to Avoid during a Child Custody Case

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Over one-quarter of children in the U.S. live with one parent, while their other parent lives in another home. This shows how prevalent divorce and child custody cases are.

If you’re a parent finding yourself in the middle of a child custody case, you may be confused about your parental rights and the uncertainty of the outcome. However, there are several things you can do to increase your chances of gaining and retaining custody or shared custody of your children.

Here’s a list of seven of the most common mistakes parents make when facing a child custody case.

1. Don’t Badmouth Your Ex to Your Child

It isn’t fair to use your children as a pawn or to create negativity in their minds about your ex. After all, your former partner is still your child’s other parent. Your children deserve the right to form their own opinions about their parents as they grow.

Put yourself in their shoes and ask yourself how you’d feel if you were spending time with each parent and hearing bad things about one of them. It would make you feel confused and stressed, two emotions that your child does not need nor deserve during this lifestyle adjustment.

Resist the temptation to speak of your ex in a negative light when your child is present. If you must, confide privately with a friend or family member without your child being there. 

2. Don’t Repeatedly Cancel Visits

Being repeatedly late for picking up your children for visits or having to constantly cancel or reschedule visitations does damage in two ways.

First, it really hurts your child. They will feel that they’re no longer a priority in your life and that you don’t care enough to follow through on spending time with them.

Children need to know they’re still loved and valued by both parents after the relationship ends. One of the best ways of giving them this assurance is to be there for them when you say you will.

Second, this behavior will make you look bad in your ex’s eyes and in the court. It will make the court think you’re not serious about making a commitment to child custody. Your ex can make a record of repeat cancellations and no-shows and use it against you in a court of law.

3. Don’t Disrespect the Court

Always respect court officials and what is asked of you. If you are ordered to take a parenting class or get help for a substance abuse problem, do it. If you are issued a temporary order, you must obey it.

Wear professional clothing when attending court and respect the judge and other court officials. Dressing appropriately shows that you take the child custody hearing seriously, and this small action will help you make a positive impression.

Never lie to the court or your lawyer. The truth always comes out eventually, and it can hurt your parental rights.

4. Don’t Be Anything Other Than a Great Parent

You don’t stop being a parent just because you’re no longer living with the mother or father of your child. So while you no longer have your partner with you, that doesn’t mean you can skimp on raising your child properly.

Be a good parent by creating a safe environment for your child when they’re with you. Any firearms that you own should be securely locked up. Any films you watch with your children should be family movies or age appropriate for them.

You don’t want to leave your children unsupervised or enforce corporal punishment. This information will get back to your ex, and it could get blown out of proportion into a domestic violence issue.

Make sure they have plenty of nourishing, healthy food to eat, and a comfortable place to sleep. Don’t abuse alcohol or take drugs. It may sound like common sense, but you always want to present yourself as the best parent you can possibly be.

5. Don’t Neglect to Pay Child Support

Don’t neglect or forget to pay child support to your ex. They can use this information against you, and you could lose visitation rights. 

If you find yourself with a financial hardship whether from a job loss or emergency, do let the judge know. File a motion to make the court aware, and you may receive permission to reduce your child support until you have the funds again.

6. Don’t Take the Kids on a Trip without Letting Your Ex Know

Taking your child on a trip without your ex’s permission can quickly look like a kidnapping situation.

Always ask your ex if you can take your child on a vacation. Provide them with all of the information they need to know, such as contact info for the hotel, flight numbers, and departure and arrival times.

Doing so shows that you can be trusted by both your ex and the court.

7. Don’t Lose Your Cool

Although emotions run high in times of divorce and figuring out child custody rights, try not to get angry with your ex, especially in front of your kids. It’s especially important to avoid any kind of physical contact as that will not help your case and can turn it into a domestic violence incident.

Take a deep breathe and leave the room during a heated argument if you have to. Never threaten your ex and always try to keep the environment as calm as possible.

Winning Your Child Custody Case

Avoiding these seven child custody case mistakes will put you in good standing with the court and help you work out an agreement with your ex sooner rather than later.

If you find yourself facing a child custody case, you need a family attorney who cares about you and your parental rights. Start by conducting a search for family attorneys near you.

temporary order

Family Law: What Is a Temporary Order?

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You and your ex cannot get along. And you’ve finally decided that it’s time to go your separate ways. Trouble is, you can’t reach an agreement on the terms of the separation either. So, you ask for a temporary order.

One of the most common mistakes divorcing couples make is disregarding a temporary order. That’s a serious problem since temporary orders are designed to help spouses hold their own until a divorce is finalized.

Here, we’re explaining everything you need to know about a temporary order, including how it works, what it’s for, and how to ask for one.

What is a Temporary Order?

Let’s say two parents decide to get a divorce. Like many divorcing couples, they find that they can’t agree on exact terms for anything in their divorce. So, the divorce lawyers are called.

Then, the parent taking care of the kids realizes that they can’t afford extended legal fees while feeding and housing their kids. But they can’t take a divorce decision lying down either.

Or, the couple doesn’t have kids but they do have shared property that needs to be divided and living arrangements that need to be decided, choices that can’t be put off much longer.

Here’s the problem: most lawsuits take months, if not years, to make it to court. Divorces, especially cases where the spouses fight on every issue, are especially difficult.

This is where temporary orders can help.

What are Temporary Orders For?

Temporary orders are designed as a stopgap measure to help couples who can’t wait for the court to make a permanent decision about who gets the kids and who pays for what.

A temporary order can address several issues in a divorce. This can include child custody issues such as:

  • Who gets custody of the children
  • Who is responsible for paying child support
  • Who will carry health insurance for the children
  • Creating a temporary visitation schedule for the parent without primary custody
  • Whether a guardian is needed for the children
  • How extracurricular school expenses will be paid

It can also address property-related issues such as:

  • Which spouse will live in the marital home
  • Who is responsible for the mortgage and other shared bills
  • Who is responsible for credit card debts
  • Who drives what vehicle and who pays for what vehicle
  • How household belongings and items will be split

It can also be used to handle spousal support decisions.

Keep in mind, though, that a temporary order may not dictate the final divorce arrangement. The temporary order will remain in effect until the court reaches a final decision regarding the divorce.

Why are Temporary Orders Important?

With all of that in mind, it should be fairly obvious why temporary orders are important, especially with regards to child custody.

If the two spouses have an amicable split or can agree on several issues, that can help expedite the process considerably–they may even be able to avoid going to court altogether.

But if the two spouses cannot agree, they’re going to have to continue to handle joint expenses and responsibilities before their divorce is finalized. This is a tricky problem, especially if they cannot agree on the terms of support.

Unfortunately, children rely on their parents to care for them, and children are often the unintentional sufferers when divorcing parents cannot get along.

Even if a couple doesn’t have any children, a temporary order can be a lifesaver. Say that a couple bought a house together primarily on the salary of one spouse. If that spouse leaves, the other could be stuck in a home they can’t afford any longer or saddled with debts they can’t afford to repay.

In this case, a temporary order keeps that spouse from drowning in debt while the divorce proceedings continue.

When Should You Ask for a Temporary Order?

With that in mind, let’s talk about when you should ask for a temporary order.

When two spouses decide to divorce and one of them moves out of the house, you have two options: agree on how to divide child custody and shared expenses, or, if you cannot agree, ask a judge to make the decision on your behalf.

Most couples wind up with the latter option.

If there are critical issues you cannot agree on that can’t wait months, you should ask for a temporary order immediately. Especially if you’re the spouse who’s taking care of the children or saddled with the bills.

How to Ask for a Temporary Order

If it sounds like a temporary order is something you’re going to need, let’s talk about how to get one.

What You’ll Need

Before you ask a judge for a temporary order, you’re going to need a few things on hand, such as:

  • A request for the court order you want
  • A proposed temporary order granting the relief you’re requesting
  • A supporting declaration
  • A proof of service

In some states, your request will include an Application for Order to Show Cause and an Order to Show Cause. These are basic legal documents outlining what you’re asking for–you just need to fill in boxes.

You’ll also need a proposed temporary order. If the judge grants your order, they’ll sign the proposed order. The supporting declaration sets out the legal justifications for granting the order under penalty of perjury.

What to Expect at the Hearing

Once you have the necessary documents, you and your lawyer can prepare for the hearing. Usually, this is held within a few weeks of submitting the request, but in an emergency, it can be held in a few days.

This type of hearing typically takes 20 minutes or less. The judge will review the details you’ve provided, ask your spouse for their side of the story, ask a few clarifying questions, and (in child support cases) refer to the state’s recommended support guidelines.

After the hearing, the judge will issue a decision within a week. If your request has solid legal standing, they’ll either grant the order you requested or modify it somewhat. This decision will stay in effect until the divorce is finalized, either through a court decision or an agreement between spouses.

Need a Family Attorney for Your Case?

If it sounds like you might need a temporary order, then it’s time to find a family lawyer who can help.

We help you find a family lawyer, whether you live in San Antonio, Washington DC, or a totally different region of the country.

And if you’re still looking for guidance, check out our blog for more tips, like these eight signs you need a child custody lawyer.

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Living Together While Divorcing: Should You Move Out?

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While millennials get blamed for a lot, one thing they can’t be blamed for is a rise in the divorce rate. That’s because, between 2008 and 2016, the rate dropped by more than 18 percent.

Despite this, divorce is still occurring in an overwhelming number of marriages. And the overall divorce rate won’t matter much to you if your own marriage is coming to an end.

When a divorce is imminent, you’ll have a lot of decisions to make. One big one is where you’ll live during the divorce.

If you’re going through a rough spot, keep reading to learn questions you need to ask yourself before you decide whether living together while divorcing is an option for you.

Are You Safe in Your Home?

If you feel unsafe in your home, the answer to the question, “should I move out of the house before the divorce,” is simple; yes.

Maybe domestic abuse is the reason behind your divorce to begin with. Or your soon-to-be-ex has become violent now that he or she knows you’re leaving.

Whatever the case, if there is any chance that your situation may become physically or emotionally unsafe, it’s important to get out right away. Stay with friends or family if possible, as opposed to staying alone in a hotel, in case your ex does come looking for you.

If you need to stay in your home for any reason, you’ll need to figure out how to your spouse to move out during the divorce instead. This may require obtaining a restraining order against your spouse and getting a court order for him or her to leave the house so that you may remain.

If your spouse fights the restraining order and the order to leave your house, you need to decide whether or not you think it’s likely he or she will break the order. If you feel they might, it may still be safer for you to stay with friends and family rather than putting yourself or your children at risk by staying put.

Are Children Involved?

Divorce is always emotionally difficult. But when children are involved, things get much more complicated.

That isn’t to say you shouldn’t get divorced if you and your spouse have children.

In fact, research shows that most children will adjust to divorce within 2 years. But children of parents who constantly fight and don’t get a divorce experience more lasting emotional problems.

However, there are a few things you can do to help make the adjustment to a separated family less harmful to your children.

Deciding Who Stays with the Kids and Who Goes

Both you and your spouse remaining in the home together is one way to protect your children. But this is only a viable option if you and your spouse are on good terms.

The last thing you want to do is expose your children to endless arguments. If you know that you won’t be able to keep your fighting from occurring in front of your kids, it may be best for one spouse to move out.

The other option is to keep your children in your home and have you and your spouse trade off who stays there, on a set schedule.

If you know that you and your spouse will be co-parenting after the divorce is finalized, this may be a great way to start practicing while also protecting your children from some of the trauma of your divorce.

However, if you can’t trust your spouse or if one of you won’t be around enough to care for your children on your own, this may not be an option. In this case, it may be best for the primary caregiver to stay in the home with your kids while the other moves elsewhere.

Minimizing the Effect of Divorce on Your Kids

Another factor to consider is whether you will be fighting your spouse for custody. If you think you may need a child custody lawyer because your spouse thinks he or she deserves custody that you don’t feel they should have, this can make living together tense.

You don’t want your children to see you fighting with your spouse over who will be caring for them after the divorce.

While you don’t want your kids to see you arguing, that doesn’t mean you should keep everything from them. Being honest with your children about what is happening is important. Give them notice before any big changes occur, like one spouse moving out.

This will give your kids time to adjust to the changes, making them easier to handle.

Is Supporting Two Households Financially Possible?

If finances are tight, there may be no point in arguing about who has to move out in a divorce.

If you and your spouse can’t afford a second household and don’t have family or friends one of you can stay with, you’ll both need to remain in the house.

Unless you are on good terms, you may want to set boundaries on your living situation. This could include setting rules about having guests over, assigning separate spaces for each of you to use, and agreeing to split costs like food and household items.

If you have children together, deciding to keep any arguments to yourselves is a must.

If you know your divorce is likely to drag on, you might consider selling your home to give yourselves money to buy or rent two smaller properties that you could live in separately.

Living Together While Divorcing

Whether or not you and your spouse will be living together while divorcing is something you’ll need to decide for yourself. You’ll need to consider your personal situation, your children if you have them, and whether it’s financially responsible for one of you to move to a second home.

But there are other parts of your divorce that you shouldn’t handle on your own.

If you and/or your spouse have decided to end your marriage, it’s time to decide whether you want the help of a lawyer to navigate the process. Click here to learn 8 reasons why a divorce lawyer might be a good choice for you.

How to Get Custody of Your Grandchild

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Around the country, nearly 3 million grandparents are raising their grandchildren instead of biological parents. This is so normal that judges and legal systems across the country know how to grant this custody in a standardized manner. IF you’re trying to figure out how to get custody of your grandchild, patience will be your ally and honesty will be your best friend.

Here are five things to consider when aiming for custody of grandchildren.

1. Understand the Stakes

When you’re seeking to get involved with your grandchildren’s guardianship, you need to be realistic about who you’re fighting against. You need to maintain peace at all costs with your children, as they could make it harder for you to get the custody you’re seeking.

You’re grandchildren likely have two parents who could be vying for custody of them. Whether or not you think their parents would be the best guardians, it might not be likely that you’re going to get custody.

If both of the children’s parents are willing to come to court and testify, the judge is likely to see them both as potentially fit to care for the children. This might be hard for you to face, but you have to see the people you’re fighting against are your own children. Fighting against them viciously will tell the judge everything they need to know about what kind of parent you’d be.

You might have the time, resources, and wherewithal to take care of the children, but it’s not up to you. Perhaps, instead of fighting for custody, you offer all the support you can to the children. Let them know you carer and set boundaries with their parents.

The children will see you for the loving family that you are and will eventually seek to spend more time with you.

2. Timing Is Key

One of the times that grandparents will sometimes try to get in the middle of a custody battle and advocate their own guardianship. This might seem like a good opportunity, but ultimately it’s a bad look for grandparents.

You might think you can make a good case, but you’ll be looking at the custody battle through the eyes of an opportunist. This will make it look like you think that passing the children around like a football is good for the family. Don’t risk looking like you’re heartless.

Be careful with how you time your custody case. Support a parent’s right to their children and you’ll find them more receptive to sending children to spend time with you. Unless you feel that you can prove that the child or children would be in physical danger in the hands of either parent, you shouldn’t try to get custody.

Remain supportive until you can prove it’s a bad idea.

3. Keep Your Eyes On Safety

The issues that courts and judges will be most receptive to are going to be centered around the safety of children. Your most strategic advantages will lie in taking advantage of situations where parents can’t take care of the children safely. While you shouldn’t let the children get into an unsafe position to prove your point, take note of any warning signs.

When you point out how the children are endangered, it will make it much harder for parents to win a custody case. You’ll look like a stronger candidate for custody when you show the disparity in safety and support that children will receive.

If there are stressful situations that you can prove the children have already gone through, you’ll have a strong case. When children survive trauma, it marks them for years to come. If you can tell a judge what’s happened and why it will happen again, you can make a strong case for why you should have custody.

4. Calling Police or Protective Services is Tricky

Don’t immediately call Child Protective Services or 911 if suspect there’s an issue. This can also endanger and traumatize children. Seeing parents taken away in handcuffs or being whisked away to foster care is a memory that will scar your grandchildren.

If your grandchildren are in immediate danger of being abused or neglected, then you should consider calling. However, if you can’t prove that it’s happening or has happened recently, you will be calling for no reasons. You’ll seem like you’re harassing the parents, your children, rather than trying to help your grandchildren.

State officials will be required to follow through on reports that you make. If it looks like you’ve given a false report, that will end up on record. This will look bad for you in court.

If you’re trying to build a case, false reporting could shatter your chances of proving that your grandchildren are in dire straits.

5. Get The Right To Visit

Visitation rights can be powerful. If your grandchildren can’t trust other adults and don’t feel safe with their parents, they could open up to you. When push comes to shove, they could testify on your behalf if you seek custody at a later date.

Start by asking to be allowed visitation rights. If you have a relationship that’s a lot like a parent-child relationship and you can prove it, you will easily get the right to visit children.

Rather than getting custody outright, being able to visit them could make your role official. If anything bad happens, you’ll be in line to take over for their parents. The court will evaluate your role and assess how much time you get with them.s’ fitness.If you provide significant support, find a way to show it to the court. Figuring Out How To Get Custody of Your Grandchildren is Complicated

When you’re trying to navigate how to get custody of your grandchildren, you’re going to struggle with the legal system. However, at the end of the day, you need to do what’s best for your grandchildren and respect what the court says. Your goal needs to be to support your grandchildren, not to win custody.

Before you hire a family lawyer, check out our guide for tips.